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Anger Management

Anger

Everyone gets angry from time to time. It's a normal emotion we feel when something in our lives is changed in an unpleasant way. Although we all have feelings of anger, it is important to know how to identify the source of your anger and respond to the emotion in a healthy way.

Unhealthy Reactions to Anger

All people react to anger, but it is important to react to anger in healthy rather than unhealthy ways. Unhealthy reactions to anger include:

Explosive and aggressive outbursts that are out of proportion to the preceding stressor.
Overreaction of hostility to insignificant irritants.
Swift and harsh judgment statements made to or about others.
Use of verbally abusive language.
Physical reactions and abuse, such as hitting an object or person.

Identifying Anger

It's important to identify the source of your anger, since once you've identified the source, you're more capable of managing your anger. Usually, anger starts with one source, though it may not be your "primary" emotion. It might actually be a reaction to another emotion, such as frustration, hurt feelings or embarrassment. If anger is not recognized and managed, it can continue to build and cause much distress. When something in your life is unpleasant and causes anger, take the time to identify your anger, manage it, and finally resolve it.

Managing Anger

There are many different options to managing one's anger. It's important you find a strategy that works well for you. Some options include:

Stop and count to 10 before you say or do anything.
Practice deep breathing exercise: breathe in for 5 counts through nose, exhale for 5 counts through mouth (repeat 3 times.)
Write an angry (unsent) letter to people who often anger you to determine the reason they anger you so easily.
Use "I" messages to relate to those who cause you anger. Be sure to let them know how you feel without blaming them for your anger.
Leave the situation and take a "time out" to help yourself calm down. Return to the situation when you feel able to have a conversation and resolve the issue of concern.
Practice yoga and stretching exercises to help relax your muscles and help you feel much calmer.
Use imagery by visualizing a relaxing experience.

Resolving Anger

After managing your anger, it's necessary to resolve your anger. It may take some time to resolve your anger, though, depending on the situation that produced your anger. Remember, it's vital that you don't repress your anger, since repressing it only adds to more emotional distress. If you commit to confronting and reflecting on your anger, this will assist you in resolving it. Again, it's important you find an option that works well for you. Some options include:

Communicate with the person who was involved in the situation that caused you anger. Remember to use "I" messages and let them know how you feel without blaming them for your anger. Come up with a solution, together.
Write in a journal to help express your feelings and emotions. Reflect on those entries and determine what you can do.
Listen to or play music to aid you in reflecting on your source of anger.
Draw, paint or craft to aid you in reflection of the situation that caused you to become angry.
Write poetry, stories and lyrics to help you reflect on the source of your anger.

What Do I Do Now?

If you are concerned about or have trouble managing your anger, contact the Counseling Center at 812/464-1867. We can provide information, short-term counseling, and referrals to a mental health professional in the community for long-term therapy.

8600 University Boulevard - Evansville, IN 47712-3596 - 812/464-8600